Exploring the World of Ball Gags: A Safe and Exciting BDSM Toy

If the cuffs and floggers look too intimidating for the start of your BDSM journey, we have just the device for you. Ball gags are your little pocket-friendly toys you can blend into any BDSM scene. You can start with them or use them to make the scene more exciting. 

What makes ball gags so good? Well, for the wearer, it’s one way to be free of thought and give in to total submission. For the one in a dominant position, it can be a heady feeling to have this much trust from someone. After all, allowing someone to take away your speech temporarily is a strong show of trust. 

Let’s see what Ball gags are and how you can use them. 

Ball Gags 101

A gag is a sex toy used during BDSM. It can be any object you put into your partner’s mouth, making them submissive and unable to talk. For all purposes, a gag can be a mere scarf. 

A ball gag is a more specific sex toy. It’s a round ball usually made of silicone, rubber, or plastic. You put the ball in your mouth and use the straps extending from it to secure it behind your head. The ball gag sits behind your teeth. 

So, your mouth doesn’t technically close while you’re wearing one. 

You won’t be able to speak but you can grunt or make other indecipherable noises. You can even hum a tune. Some people drool a bit while wearing the ball gag as well. 

You might pair the gag with cuffs, ropes, or other forms of restraints. In BDSM, the one wearing the ball gag is usually in a submissive position while the partner is the dominant one. But this doesn’t mean you can’t change it or play it up a little. 

Some of the appeal of ball gags comes from the ability to make as many noises as you want without worrying about being too loud. The gag lowers your voice level anyway. You’re also forced to breathe through your nose, creating heavy panting sounds. 

Your partner might take pleasure in the erotic look the ball gag gives you as well. 

Types of Ball Gags

Beyond the basic design, you will find about 5 types of ball gags:

1. Standard Ball Gag

This is the conventional ball gag. There are two straps and a round ball in the middle. For first-time ball gag users, you want to start with a small ball and work your way up. 

You can increase the time you keep the gag on as you opt for a bigger size as well. The Sportsheets Locking Lace Ball Silicone Gag is a pretty good one to start with. It’s got a lock and key so you can shift the dynamic to one of power exchanges. 

If you’re worried about breathing, the Fetish Tentation Rigid Ball Gag has little piercings in the ball to allow you to breathe. 

2. Bar Gag

Bar gag or bit gag, as the name suggests, has a horizontal bar instead of a sphere ball. It’s more breathable and you can bite down on the bar. 

If you have a small mouth, you will like a bar gag. Your mouth isn’t forced apart as much as you have something preventing you from speaking with a bar gag. Go for the soft, plush silicone Calexotics Boundless Bar Gag and see if this is more your jam. 

3. O-ring Gags and Lip Gags

O-ring gags are metal pieces with an opening in the middle. It stops your mouth from moving too much, but enough to perform blowjobs. You can breathe better with this one as well since your mouth isn’t clamped shut. 

The Pipedream Products Fetish Fantasy O-Ring Gag also has nipple clamps with it. It makes for a particularly pretty toy. 

Similarly, lip gags look like lips and cover your teeth completely. But they have an opening in the middle you can use for blowjobs. 

4. Spider Gag

A spider gag is almost the same as an O-ring gag. But, 4 spires extend out of the O-ring. You can’t move the O-ring at all while you’re wearing this one. 

Something like the Fetish Fantasy Extreme Spider Gag helps hit the submission home because of how restrictive it is. 

5. Penis Gag

Instead of a ball or bar, the centerpiece is a small dildo. Due to the shape, you can insert it deeper into your mouth. 

It makes the wearer feel like they’re deepthroating. It works well for people who like the feeling of almost being choked. 

The Fetish Tentation Medium Penis Gag is a good one to go for. In general, take measurements of the dildo before you try the gag. It should fit your mouth and shouldn’t actually choke you. 

The Silent Dialogue and Expressing Consent with Ball Gags

Communication and consent can get increasingly tricky with ball gags involved. You have to rely on non-verbal cues and prior discussion before you set the scene. 

Here are some communication and consent tricks you can use to come out of it with nothing but pleasure. 

1. Get Full Consent Beforehand

Any kind of BDSM scene or sex scene in general, should have full, 100% consent from all parties involved. If there’s even a little bit of hesitance from either side, you should table the discussion for the time being. 

A ball gag specifically renders a person's ability to speak. If there isn’t mutual consent on how the whole scene will go, it’s easy to veer into dangerous territories. 

2. Set The Scene

It would be a good idea to try the ball gag on in a non-sexual context first. Let the wearer decide how tight it should be. 

You should also set a time limit. For example, 10 minutes is a good amount of time for first-time wearers. 

More than anything, you should go through a detailed list of what sexual activities you will engage in with the ball gag. Decide how it will start and end. 

Don’t forget to discuss the kind of aftercare the wearer prefers either. Some like to cuddle, while others need a quick drink to calm down. 

3. Decide on Non-Verbal Cues

Non-verbal cues are ways you can let your partner know whether you like something or not when you’re gagged. You can get the entire thing to stop with a selected gesture. 

You have to decide on the signals beforehand and both parties should know what each gesture means by heart. 

Non-verbal cues BDSM practitioners use:

• Knocking on the furniture to signal yes or no if the gagged person is near one. 
• Tapping your partner to signal a tap-out
• Some hold a bell and ring it to mean to stop
• Dropping a scarf or a ball to indicate you want to take a break
• Something as simple as snapping fingers
• You can hum specific tunes
• Some people rely on outright blinking, headshakes, or flexing their hands thrice. 

Instead of going for body signals like blinking or headshakes, it’s better if you settle for blatant gestures like knocking or dropping something. 

Silent body cues can be easier to miss. More so if you’ve only begun experimenting and have yet to sort out the nuances. 

Gearing Up Safe and Sound

Beyond consent and expectations, there are some safety measures you should take while using a ball gag:

1. Constant Check-Ins

This applies to BDSM in general. But if one person is restrained in any way, such as with a ball gag or with their hands tied up, you should never leave them alone. 

You should have a clear view of them so you can pick up on any body signals. Your partner might have trouble breathing or face sudden anxiety attacks.

They might not be able to use their safe words at all. You have to make the executive decision to release them immediately. 

If your partner is gagged and tied up, you should hyperfocus on them even. Being able to catch a single blink might be the only thing stopping the entire experience from turning bad. 

2. Don’t Wear a Ball Gag If You Have a Cold

Ball gags don’t let you breathe through your mouth properly. If your nose is blocked as well due to a cold, you will have difficulty breathing altogether. 

It’s one situation where wearing a ball gag is a futile and unsafe experience from the start. 

3. Clean The Gag Ball

Always clean the gag ball before and after use. It’s going to be in your mouth. If there’s saliva or germs sticking to it, you can end up giving yourself a bacterial infection. 

Ball gags are usually made of rubber or silicone. So, you can wash them with soap and warm water. For extra safety, you can spray disinfectants as well. 

Final Thoughts

Compared to most BDSM toys, ball gags are pretty much on the safe side. If you keep a close eye on your partner, there’s little chance of any accidents occurring. 

Ball gags do not mess with your body function in any way. The only time you have to be a little worried is if you wear a ball gag with a cold, which you should never do. 

So, go ahead. Make your first purchase and see what kind of fun you can get up to with a ball gag.