Breaking the Taboo: Why It's Time to Talk About Male Masturbators

Sex toys, whether you use one or not, are items we’re all curious about to some level. While women are more likely to bring up their latest purchase in a regular Sunday lunch break, men balk at the idea of anyone knowing they use sex toys. 

If they do have sex toys, many tend to go for couples’ items. Male masturbators can be massively neglected or hidden away at the back of the cupboard. This is because the stigma and taboo surrounding male masturbators is still strong. 

Let’s discuss why it might be time to break out of it. 

What are Male Masturbators?

Male masturbators mainly refer to sleeves and strokers. It’s basically any sex toy meant to capture the feeling of inserting your penis into a human body part like the vagina, anus, or the mouth.

Sleeves tend to be open at both ends or in some cases have one end closed, taking on the shape of a cylindrical cup. These are manual toys. Some can be extra smooth, while others have a textured, ribbed inside. 

Meanwhile, strokers are devices with various functions like ticklers, suction, or vibrations. But the mechanism is the same. Modern-day strokers can connect to virtual reality and 2D interactive content. You can also sync the stroker with other devices for partnered play. 

Male masturbators used to be more blatant with the design. The classic Fleshlight products didn't leave much room for imagination. If it fell out of your bag, anyone in the vicinity would know what it was for. 

Masturbators today are more discreet, with brands like Tenga creating pocket-sized, disposable masturbators you can have as a travel companion. 

The Benefits of Male Masturbators

If caring for your sexual health makes you feel ashamed, learning some of the benefits of male masturbators and masturbating might help you overcome some of it. Here are some of the many advantages: 

• Compared to men who orgasm 4 to 7 times per month, men who ejaculate 21 times or more in a month have a 31% lower chance of developing prostate cancer. 
• Using male masturbators can help you prevent developing erectile dysfunction. As you get older, you start losing muscle mass
• everywhere, even there. Masturbation sends a rush of blood to your penis, supplying it with oxygen to keep your muscles stronger. 
• Like all things, you build up a tolerance when you masturbate. If you finish in 2 minutes with strokes, the more you masturbate and make an attempt to hold off, you can extend your session to three minutes and so on. 
• Other than drugs, orgasm results in the biggest dopamine rush. This is regardless of gender. So, if you’re in a particularly bad mood, using a male masturbator might be one way to calm down. The relaxed feeling helps you fall asleep quicker as well. 
• Men who had 2 or more orgasms per week are 45% less likely to die of heart attack. This calls back to the rush of blood and oxygen circulation your entire body gets when you masturbate, keeping your heart healthier. 

Let's Talk About It: How to Start the Conversation

Even now, we can’t say women are free of the social stigma surrounding the use of sex toys. Historically, women have experienced severe restrictions revolving sex, where most didn’t feel in control of their bodies and sexual choices. 

Sex toys, hand in hand with feminism, have played a big role in making them prouder and more willing to explore their sexuality. Naturally, as the conversation around sex became more open and common, efforts have been made to make sex toys acceptable for all genders. 

Still, it’s hard to look past the initial perception of sex toys for many, especially regarding men. Some tend to think men who use sex toys are either extremely kinky, perverted, or someone who can’t easily get a partner. 

A lot of it is linked to the stereotypical portrayal of the macho man in society. It’s why the stigma around the use of sex toys is less present in LGBT communities. Gay men, in general, use more sex toys than straight men. 

The design of the toys has some role in the flak male masturbators get as well.  

The Fleshlight usually brings up the image of a realistic-looking vagina or anus on a tube. Meanwhile, if you think of a dildo, you will remember the colorful, fun ones over the realistic ones. 

Male masturbators today are more refined. While the Fleshlight-like products are not something you should be ashamed of, it’s easy to get masturbators with no resemblance to any human body part. 

Combine these changes with deliberate attempts at having healthier conversations regarding men’s sexual health, the needle will move for male sex toys as well. Perhaps a good way to start would be by discussing the benefits of male masturbators with your partner. 

For example, a 2009 study found men who use sex toys tend to show more sexually healthy behavior such as checking for testicular cancer and visiting sexual health clinics. Not to mention male masturbators help increase stamina and prevent ED. 

You’re literally reducing your chance of prostate cancer by using male masturbators. Focus on these things and start having conversations with those around you, starting with your healthcare provider. 

And we will get closer to diminishing the cultural taboo surrounding male sex toys. 

Choosing Your Champion: A Short Buying Guide to Male Masturbators

The variety of male masturbators can be overwhelming for first-time buyers. This mini guide to choosing your male masturbator can help you find your ride or die product:

1. Heating

Heating can recreate the feeling and moist texture of being inside someone. Some enjoy the warm sensation in general. If you have a partner, it can lead to a bit of a power play where they decide they play with the temperature as well. 

If you want a masturbator with a heating option, Satisfyer Men Heat Vibration is a good option. It can reach 40°C and has 11 vibration modes to take you over the edge. 

2. Size

Your masturbator should be able to fit the entirety of your penis. With sleeves, you can find stretchable ones. You don’t need to worry about the size. But make sure to get durable ones like the Tenga Egg Standard pack.  

But strokers come in specific sizes with pre-decided height, breadth, and length. You should check all of these before buying one. 

3. Vibration

Along with suction and tickling sensation, the vibration is what makes people buy their first stroker. Unlike suction and ticklers, vibrations don’t attempt to recreate the experience of being sucked or blown. It’s more about hitting you with all kinds of extra sensations you feel in every inch of your muscle. 

Among these, the pocket-sized Hot Octopuss Pulse Solo Essential is a fan favorite because of its discreet appearance and below < 55dB noise level. 

The Male Rose Gawk is another beloved male masturbator. It’s almost scary how good it is. After all, it combines rotation with vibration, not letting you breathe for a second. 

4. Insert Depth

This is related to the size of the masturbator. The insertable depth of the stroker or sleeve is something you should look into. 

Some people don’t like feeling everything all at once. They might prefer only inserting the head, while others like going balls deep. Depending on your preferences, you can go for something like the Fun Factory Jewels Manta Male Stroker. It’s a particularly unique one with how it adjusts to any size and perfectly imitates blow jobs. 

5. Lasting Time

If you go for a manual stroker or sleeve, you don’t need to worry about your use time. It’s about how long you can last.

For example, the Drywell Hurricane Men Masturbator has ribs and twists you have to push through as you go through the motion of suction and release. You can take your sweet time reaching the finish line. 

The product itself will be usable as long as you keep it clean. 

Meanwhile, the Tenga Original Vacuum Cup is a pre-lubed stroker meant for one-time use. 

But with vibrating strokers, you have to worry about the battery time. For example, the Tenga Flip Zero Electronic lasts about 40 minutes if you charge it for 90 minutes. The Fun Factory Cobra Libre has a run time of 40 to 120 minutes. 

The Lelo F1S V2 lasts an entire 2 hours after charging it for the same amount of time. 

With battery-powered strokers, you should look for their lifetime-lasting information. 

6. Material

The material is far more important in male masturbators than you think. After all, the entire premise of a masturbator is based around the various textures and sensations you feel wrapped around your penis as you use it. 

Some people don’t enjoy friction at all. When they use a sleeve, they expect it to be as plain as a sock. If this is you, you might want to buy the Tenga Hard Boiled pack. These are disposable sleeves hidden in the shape of eggs. 

While the main part of the sleeve will have ribs and ridges, the other side is smooth like jelly. You can flip it over if you want a plain sleeve or use the regular part of the sleeve. 

Your main choices will mostly be between silicone, TPE, or more brand-specific options like the Ultraskyn you will find in the Doc Johnson Mood Pleaser Masturbator.

Rather than material, you should focus on the texture. Do you like the spiral design of the Calexotics The Gripper more or the repeated round cut soft cushiony feel of the Tenga Uni Topaz? 

Final Thoughts

If you’ve been thinking about trying male masturbators for a while and the only thing stopping you is societal shame, it’s time to break out of it. Go ahead. Check out your cart. 

It’s not like you will have to advertise to everyone you’re using a sex toy. With discreet shipping from stores like XOXTOYS, you can learn to use male masturbators on your own before you make any announcement to your circle.